I know you have heard of L.L. Bean. But have you heard of D.D. Bean? No? You will, because D.D. Bean is the only company in the United States that makes matches. And without American matches, how will you light the bonfires you will need to rid yourself of all foreign made goods so you can feel truly liberated?

As Edie and I wonder (or should wonder) if we should be downsizing,  this does seem like one way to do it. I went to the D.D. Bean website, and wanted to buy some matchboxes with our name on them. I saw that the minimum quantity is 100,000 boxes. We have a lot of foreign stuff in our house, and sometimes we find it hard to get a match to catch on fire, so we might need two orders.

But it goes to show you how much we depend on foreign goods, not only high-tech goods, but…….matches. And how many things will be affected by liberating tariffs.

Digression: “tariffs” is not a beautiful word. Putting two f’s together does not make for beautiful music.

I am trying to remember what Donald Trump campaigned on…bringing down prices immediately, keeping Americans employed, ending the war in Ukraine before Inauguration Day, straightening out the Middle East. What else? Tariffs on all, ending our alliances, destroying the federal government, ending the role of lawyers and the courts, kicking qualified people out of essential jobs, picking people off the street and sending them to a prison in El Salvador without any recourse or due process, banning books, absorbing Greenland and Canada, controlling the Panama Canal, taking over cultural institutions and universities? Were these part of his campaign promises?

Liberation Day will be January 20, 2029. And this may be a very different country then.

And what if the thinkable happens? What if Trump’s dementia grows to the point that it becomes clear he can not do his job anymore?

Trump did one thing presidential candidates often do. Choose a vice-president so clearly incompetent that his incompetence becomes insurance that the president will be allowed to serve out his term. I have no ready response on this one other than to say a Vance regime would be short-lived.

In the meantime, higher prices are just around the corner. Buckle your Chinese made seat belt. It’s gonna be a bumpy ride in your Mexican made car.

By the way, did you catch Cory Booker’s speech yesterday? I missed it, but I am going to listen to it this morning, this afternoon, this evening, tonight, and tomorrow morning.

And I am going to be thinking about Liberation Day.

“Matchmaker, Matchmaker……”