Elon Musk has apparently now paid $1 million to two young, white Wisconsin residents as part of his campaign to elect a Republican to the State Supreme Court, something which would, as I understand it, help Tesla sell more cars in the State. Musk stated that “I think this will be important for the future of civilization. It’s that important.”

I have done a little calculating. I think that, based on the current valuation of Tesla stock, he could give $1 million to about 350,000 Americans, and still remain comfortably a billionaire. Or he could hide $1 million in new Teslas over the next, say, ten years. At the 2024 rate of sales, that would be about 2,400,000 cars over the next ten years, with a $1 million gift hidden in about 15% of the cars sold. Of course, with so many opportunities to wind up with a million dollars, the number of cars sold would be greatly increased, bringing down the percentage of winners, but probably still enough to promote the sales.

In fact, why stop here? This would be a brilliant marketing device for any company, turning the US economy into a massive lottery which would raise consumption levels, benefit both buyers and sellers, and even help close the trillion dollar annual deficit for the federal government.

“Brilliant idea, Art”, you say, “But if you’re so smart, why aren’t you rich?”

We don’t have to answer that question right now. Let’s just move on.

Yesterday was the first day in a long time that I don’t think I watched any TV news. I guess what I missed was Trump saying that he might run for a third term as our president. I will tell you this: I have as much chance being elected for a third term as Trump does. This is not something to lose any sleep over. But perhaps Trump could run, in 2028, for the presidency of Greenland. I say that, without having any idea of the limitations of the Greenland constitution (or if there even is such a document), because there are only about 45,000 adults over the age of 18 in Greenland (this is an estimate based on information provided me by the friendly mental robots at Google AI). Let’s assume (Google AI could not really help me on this one) that this included 30,000 adults in two person families, and 15,000 who live by themselves. Let’s assume (for the sake of this demonstration) that everyone voted (I know what you are thinking: half of the Greenland population is always out fishing, and wouldn’t be available to vote on a given day), so Trump would need 22, 501 votes to win. Let’s also assume that the population of Greenland is less materialistic than the population of the United States and that they would be satisfied with $100,000 rather than $1,000,000.

You can do the math. Trump (even without help from Musk or Peter Thiel or any of the others) could buy presidency of Greenland in 2028, and then work to incorporate Greenland into the United States.

But, you say, there will be roadblocks. You would need the president of the United States (much less Congress and others) to agree. And you don’t know who the president of the United States will be.

Oh, but I think we do. By 2028, the Musk fortune (due to the Art-ful Tesla marketing campaign) will be growing exponentially, and Elon will have the ability to pay off potential voters once again, helping select the next president of the United States.

But who will that be? I can’t pinpoint specifically, who it will be, but I will predict this. THE 48TH PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES WILL BE A “DEI” SELECTION!

“Art, you gotta be kidding. DEI is dead in the water.”

No, it isn’t. In 2028 it will be alive and kicking: Don Jr., Eric, or Ivanka.

(And you thought if I didn’t watch the news, I wouldn’t have anything to say.)