You would think that, after conscientiously writing this blog for over a year, I would know how to “search” within it, but I don’t. I think that maybe I have to make it searchable, which I haven’t done. I am going to try to figure that out.
I am thinking about this now only because it is Christmas and I am sure I wrote something about Christmas when I was growing up a year ago. I am not going to try to repeat all of that now, except to say that, yes, Reform Jews in St. Louis in the 1940s seemed to celebrate Christmas. We knew it was not “our” holiday, and we knew the Christians had a religious reason to celebrate it and we did not, but it was a holiday, none-the-less, a different type of holiday than our Jewish holidays to be sure, but we visited people, as I recall, and we kids got a lot of presents. The presents weren’t under a tree, but they were piled up in a corner of the living room, all gift wrapped, and there were Christmas stockings filled with little things we weren’t interested in. And, yes, they were brought to us by Santa (who didn’t want to leave the Jewish kids out), who came while we were sleeping. There were no Christmas decorations and when we went to sleep, the living room looked normal. And I don’t remember the adults getting any presents, just the children. And my cousin Donna was born on Christmas day, so – after she was born (she’s a few years younger than me) – she got extra presents (I am sure – I actually don’t remember).
Yes, we also celebrated Hanukkah of course, but it was Christmas when we got the big presents (Hanukkah was generally small amounts of cash). And our schools were filled with Christmas celebrations. We used to sing Christmas songs (I never did – I would mouth the words, and always felt a little self conscious, but I would always mouth the words in Chorus, because I couldn’t carry a tune in the 1940s any better than I can in the 2020s and always felt I was doing everyone a favor) at school, but no Hanukkah songs.
At some point, I stopped believing that Santa Claus was real (I was pretty gullible) and I actually remember a conversation with a friend (don’t remember who the friend was) centered on “do you believe that Santa Claus is real?”, where we concluded that we didn’t (but that there was a chance that he was).
Anything else I remember? I remember going downtown with my parents to look at the department store Christmas windows (there were a number of large department stores in downtown St. Louis then – now of course there are none). I remember going to see Santa at Famous Barr and thinking he was the real Santa (yes, true).
At some point, Christmas stopped being a time to get presents, but I don’t really remember when that happened, which is strange, isn’t it? And, although I generally came back to St Louis over Christmas when I was in college and law school, I don’t know what we did on Christmas. Or maybe I do. We must have celebrated my cousin’s birthday, and maybe she remembers exactly what we did when she was in high school or college. Donna……please let me know.
As adults, our family did not give or get Christmas presents, did not go out for Chinese food, and I don’t think ever did anything special. We didn’t want to confuse our children. But was that the right thing to do? Perhaps it was – I don’t know many Jews who celebrate Christmas today like most Reform Jews, at least in St. Louis, seemed to 75 years ago. But guess what? I didn’t get confused. It didn’t hurt my Jewish identity or corrupt my thinking. And maybe it helped my identity as an American, as part of a larger community.
Of course, today, while Jews may refrain more from Christmas, there are so many more mixed families, including mixed families where kids are being brought up Jewish, but at least one parent wants – in some fashion – to celebrate Christmas. I hope people don’t agonize over this – does it send a mixed message? Perhaps but, based on my experience, so what?
Art is 80 
6 responses to “Christmas In St. Louie, Louie.”
Try searching for a keyword, like Santa Claus.
Judy Judyhpass@gmail.comSent from my iPad
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At 80, you still have a memory of things past. What will likely soon be needed is a search mechanism for the recent.
I’m not 80 yet, so I don’t always remember the deep past very well. Sometimes people come up to me and say, essentially, “I remember you telling me thus and such, years ago.” My general reaction is that they are putting words into my mouth, which is Sort of pleasurable, but makes me wonder.
See you on our return from Buenos Aires after Jan. 4.
Meanwhile, Merry Christmas to all the Hessels. Remember to tell them.
Bert
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In Montreal, the public schools were confessional so all the Jewish kids went to Protestant schools. We regularly recited the Lord’s Prayer and sang hymns. Christmas was a big deal, carols, decorations, art work, food, etc. No one was confused that I know of. I went to public schools in Jewish neighbourhoods so the Jewish population in any class was between 70 and 95 %. Many of the kids were the children of survivors. Because of all this, I find it somewhat amusing when people get all incensed about too much Christmas or too little Christmas. We all knew who we were. I enjoyed all the Christmas stuff at school but never wanted to be anything but Jewish.
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My mother’s extended family in Chicago included one dear Protestant aunt. She hosted Christmas of her husband’s family, all Jews, perhaps 40 or 50 of us. They had a large house in DesPlaines with an ice skating pond in the backyard. I have very happy memories of those Christmases and those times at my aunt and uncle’s. Later we moved to California and I know my mother missed those Christmases terribly. We used to go, instead, to Disneyland with another Jewish family instead on Christmas day. We also always lit Hanukkah candles and received a passel of presents (maybe it is not cool to admit that I come from a materialistic family but we were.)
Last night, in California, I brought asparagus for 28 to my neighbor’s. We have become friends. She and her husband host a wonderful Christmas Eve dinner every year for family and friends; one of my grown daughters came with me. We had a wonderful time. This is the Berkeley Hills, you know, and I have never lived in a place that values diversity as much. And, this was a diverse group (except that everybody was educated).
I have never had any identity confusion about my religious traditions or beliefs.
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This is just like my life, including everything!
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Growing up a Reformed Jew in Dallas in the 1950’s we celebrated Christmas. Many of the Jews did as well. We were a small community and my parents didn’t want me to feel odd being about the only ones celebrating Hanukkah. I really believed in Santa Clause and Christmas was my favorite time of the year. We celebrated Hanukkah one year but it wasn’t as magical as Christmas. There was no identity confusion, just enjoyment of a special time of the year.
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