
Am I right when I say that there is no language like English for having multiple definitions for so many words? This is what makes it so easy to pun in English, I assume. Okay, so we have two choices. We can talk about tomorrow’s elections or we can look at the word “bar”, just as one of many examples.
Digression: I guess we could also talk about the fallout from Israel’s elections, which is and will be ongoing for some time. I thought perhaps the Israelis could take a lesson from the Alaskans. If neither Netanyahu nor Eisenkot can pull a 61 Knesset member coalition together and another election will be required in a few months, I would suggest to the Eisenkot block that there is one way they could be sure to take control of the country. All they have to do is to find a second Bibi Netanyahu and have him run at the top of the list for one of their parties. Problem solved. End of digression.
Second digression: Speaking of names, I wondered how many Daniel Sullivans actually live in the United States, and I will tell you that I was really surprised. Gemini, which knows such things, tells me there are approximately 1200, that about one in every 288,000 Americans is named Daniel Sullivan. I had actually thought there were more than that. After all, two of them are running for the same political office in Alaska. I, myself, knew only one Dan Sullivan, a very competent high level official at the Department of Housing and Urban Development. Truth be told, he would have made a great Senator from the great State of Alaska. End of second digression.
Let’s go back to “bar”. If you go to dictionary.com, you will find the following definitions (among others): a metal or wood piece used as a guard or obstruction, like the bars of a cage; an oblong piece of any material, like a bar of soap; and ingot or lump of gold or silver; a long ridge of sand or gravel; anything that obstructs or hinders; a place where you can get beverages, especially liquor; a place where you can get food, like snacks; the room where the bar stands, like a tavern; the legal profession; the members of the legal profession; a tribunal, like the “bar of public opinion”; a band or strip, like a bar of light; a crowbar; the line marking the division between two measures of music; a barre, as used in ballet; stopping an alleged right of action; a horizontal stroke of a type character (this one is a bit beyond me); a “relatively long and slender upright of stone” in architect-talk; an iron or steel bar used in construction; a military decoration worn by some commissioned officers; the ridges on the roof of the mouth of a horse; the space between the molar and canine teeth of a horse (did you even know that a horse could have canine teeth?); and in heraldry, “a horizontal band, narrower than a fess” (gotcha there, I bet). And these don’t include how the word can be used as a verb or as a preposition, as in bar none (did you know that the bar in bar none is a preposition?).
Is there any language other than English where you can take a simple word like bar, and use it about 30 different ways? And, by the way, there are more ways to use bar than I stated above. Think, for one example, of a bar mitzvah. Well, yes, bar mitzvah did not start out as an English phrase, but either (a) it is now English as well as Hebrew et al., or (b) it is a phrase that has no English translation and is a foreign language phrase used by English speakers. If it is the latter, I ask you: at one point does a foreign phrase, used by English speakers over and over again and for which there is no English equivalent become part of the English language? I would suggest, at least for the term bar mitzvah, that 13 years would suffice. After all, the word “bar” didn’t start out as an English word. Or did it?
Third digression: This reminds me of Davy Crockett, Tennessee Congressman who died at the Alamo. You probably remember this – he killed him a bar when he was only three. I think I am going to write dictionary.com, and ask why this definition of a bar has been excluded from their list of definitions. And, I guess, I can think of one more. A “barr” is a “disappointingly politically inappropriate attorney general who is not as disappointingly politically inappropriate as some of his successors”. That too should be included. And Hopalong Cassidy’s Bar-20 Ranch……
Moving on: Congratulations to Stephanie Ruhle for running the New York Marathon and to Rabbi Lauren Holtzblatt for running the Marine Corps Marathon. I have no idea how either of them could possibly do it. And do Donald Trump for conducting 30 rallies in 30 days (something like that) and throughout the rallies being able to keep his lies consistent. No mean trick, that. And best wishes to Senator Chris Murphy of Connecticut, recovering from a stroke. May you heal sufficiently to run next year’s marathon.
Okay, all digressions over. Tomorrow is election day. I have already voted. I am very nervous (in spite of the polls). I think I need to find a friendly bar. The drinking kind, not the one in the cartoon.




































